Uber Banking

Q: Is anything faster than electronic banking to move funds?
A: Yes, its called marriage.

Value of a Dime

A man finds a dime and walks up to a coin expert and says, "This is a 1953 dime, is it worth any thing?" The expert replies, "It might be worth 10,000,000 dollars!" "Really?!" "Yeah, if you use it to scratch of a lotto ticket."

Answering Machine - Tapeless

Hello, we are all currently home, but someone stole our phone, as well as the recording tape from this answering machine. So you can't reach us until we either find a phone or get a tape. If you had to waste a quarter on this call... Sorry.