All Numbers Equal

Theorem: All numbers are equal.
Proof: Choose arbitrary a and b, and let t = a + b. Then a + b = t(a + b)(a - b) = t(a - b)a^2 - b^2 = ta - tba^2 - ta = b^2 - tba^2 - ta + (t^2)/4 = b^2 - tb + (t^2)/4(a - t/2)^2 = (b - t/2)^2a - t/2 = b - t/2a = b
So all numbers are the same, and math is pointless.

Movie Ratings

Just saw a pirated movie
On a scale of 1-10, I'd give a 3.14

Girls Are Evil

Girls = time * money
time = money, therefore: Girls = money * money (*)
But we know that money is a root of all evil, thus: m> Taking into account (*), we have: Girls = sqrt(evil)*sqrt(evil)
And finally: Girls = |evil| Thus, Girls are the absolute evil!