Student Proverbs

A first grade teacher collected old, well known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb, and had them come up with the rest.

• As you shall make your bed so shall you...mess it up.
• Better be safe than...punch a 5th grader.
• Strike while the...bug is close.
• It's always darkest before...daylight savings time.
• You can lead a horse to water but...how?
• Don't bite the hand that...looks dirty.
• A miss is as good as a...
• Mr. You can't teach an old dog new...math.
• If you lie down with the dogs, you'll...stink in the morning.
• The pen is mightier than the...pigs.
• An idle mind is...the best way to relax.
• Where there's smoke, there's...pollution.
• Happy is the bride who...gets all the presents.
• A penny saved is...not much.
• Two's company, three's...the musketeers.
• Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and...you have to blow your nose.
• Children should be seen and not...spanked or grounded.
• When the blind leadeth the blind...get out of the way.

The Answer!

One day at kindergarten, a teacher said to the class of 5-year old's, "I'll give $2 to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived." An Irish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Patrick." The teacher said, "Sorry Sean, that's not correct." Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Andrew." The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Hamish, that's not right either." Finally, a Jewish boy raised his hand and said, "It was Jesus Christ." The teacher said, "That's absolutely right, Marvin, come up here and I'll give you the $2." As the teacher was giving Marvin his money, she said, "You know Marvin, since you're Jewish, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ." Marvin replied, "Yeah. In my heart I knew it was Moses, but business is business!"

Lipstick problem!

According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Finally the principal decided that there had to be something done about it. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the custodian. She then explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every day. To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the custodian to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet and then used it to clean the mirror. Needless to say, there have been no lip prints on the mirror since!