My Dad's a Lawyer

Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Billy. What's yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second. "My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy. Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy. "No, just the regular kind," replied Tommy.

8 boys

A woman had 8 children, all of them boys. So, one day a magazine sent a journalist to her house for an interview. He asked her about the boys and what their names were; she said,  "Kevin." "Right," he said, "what about that blond one over there?" "Kevin," she said. "Oh, and the tall one with the freckles?" "Kevin," she said. "Well, and the little chubby one with the baseball cap?" "Kevin," she said. "Are all your boys called Kevin?" he asked, "isn't that terribly complicated?" "Not at all," she said, "it makes everything very easy, actually. When I shout: Kevin, tea is ready!, they all come. When I say: Kevin, it's time for bed!, they all go to bed." "I see. But what if you want only one of them?" "No problem," she answers. "Then I call them by their surnames."

Dad and Daughter Doctor Check Up

An old man and his daughter go to the doctor for his monthly checkup. During examination, the doctor asks how his nightly incontinence is. "It's fine," says the old man. "I just get up and go to the bathroom, and God turns on the light for me." The doctor finishes up the examination, and then calls in the daughter to tell her about the God-light thing. "Oh, my God!" says the daughter. "He's been using the fridge again!"