Televsion 800 Number

We were watching this commercial on television. Commercial said, 'If you're having problems with your mama whipping you, call this 800 number.' I called that number. My mama answered the phone.

Secret Magazines

One day Mom was cleaning Junior's room and in the closet she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his Father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her with out a word. So she asked him, "What should we do about this?"
Dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him."

Three Kids

Anna's mother has 3 kids, the youngest daughter's name is Penny,  the middle daughter's name is Nickel. What is the oldest daughter's name? You think you know it??? Aww,  a smart one you are! You were probably thinking her name was Dime,  but if you were really smart you would know that the oldest daughters name is Anna!!!