Mother Knows Best

My mother used to say the way to a mans heart is through his stomach. Lovely woman.
Useless surgeon.

Proud Father

When his wife gave birth to a healthy baby, a proud father went in to work and told everybody that he has a 10 lb healthy son. After hearing what was going on, the wife tells the father to quit telling everybody that the baby is 10 lb because he's only 8.6 lb.Next day at work, the father comes in and tells everyone that the baby is only 8 lb. "What do you mean, he was 10 yesterday?" "Umm, well that was before he got circumcised".

Pathetic Scumbag

You are a pathetic scumbag. Your parents were scum and you're doing a most glorious job of following the tradition.