Holiday Jokes

HUGE Collection of Holiday Jokes! ROFL with April Fool's Day, Halloween, St. Patrick's Day, Christmas, Easter, more. Crack yourself up with funny holiday jokes.

Valentine's Date

Q: Do you have a date for this Valentine's day?
A: Yes, her name is Emma. Emma Gination.

Anonymous

Beautiful Witches

Q: Why should men beware of beautiful witches?
A: They'll sweep them off their feet!

Anonymous

The Angel's Story

On Christmas Eve Santa Claus was getting ready for his annual trip. As he pulled his favorite pair of red pants on, they ripped. So, he had to take them off and put on another pair, which were a bit too tight. He then went to check on the rest of the preparations. The elves were on strike. The reindeer had shin-splints. At this point, Santa was BUMMED. He went into the kitchen to take a calming drink, and the bottle was EMPTY. Now he was really mad. All of sudden, there was a knock at the door. Santa, in his angry state, ignored it. There was another knock. Santa was in no mood for all of this. When the knock came again, Santa --filled with rage-- threw open the door. Standing there was a little angel who said, "Hi Santa! What do you want me to do with this Christmas Tree?" Hence...the story of the Angel atop the tree.

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