Costco Experience

Costco just opened their first 'experience' concept store in Michigan. Like other grocery stores they use misters to keep the produce fresh and add the sound of distant thunder with flashes of lightning. What's new is the smell of fresh rain. When you approach the milk cases you hear cows mooing and experience the smell of fresh hay. The egg cases add the sound of hens clucking and cackling with the smell of bacon and eggs cooking. The corn cases bring you the smell of melted butter.  Everything was amazing until I got to the toilet paper aisle.

Diarrhea

Q: Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary?
A: Yeah, it runs in the jeans!

Yo Mama - Ass Hair

Yo mama is like ass hair: totally useless and full of sh*t.