Yo Mama - Useless

Yo mama so stupid, she's as useless as a screen door on a submarine.

Yo Mama - Airport

Yo mama so stupid, she saw a sign that said, "Airport Left," so she turned around and went home.

License to Steal

Two Kentucky men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine, though, they pulled the bumper off the truck. They panicked and fled, leaving the chain still attached to the machine, their bumper still attached to the chain, and their license plate still attached to the bumper.