Father Shark

A father shark is talking to his son. The father says, "I'm going to teach you how to catch a human. First you raise your fin out of the water and start circling. Continue circling for about 5 minutes, then you go in and eat them."
"Why circle them?" asks the son.
The father replies, "They taste better without shit in them."

Back Talk

Mother: "Are you talking back to me?!"
Son: "Well yeah, that's kinda how communication works."

Old Enough For Cursing

Two brothers, ages 6 and 8, decide they are old enough to start cursing. So they plan to use dirty words the next morning at breakfast. The 8-year-old says he'll use the world HELL and tells the 6-year-old to use ASS. Well, the next morning they head downstairs for breakfast. When their mother asks them what they want, the 8-year-old says, "Ah, Hell, I'll have some Fruit Loops." Shocked, the mother wheels around and backhands him on his chair, sending him screaming back upstairs. She then turns to the 6-year-old and says, "What are you going to have?" He replies, "I don't know, but you can bet your ass it ain't gonna be Fruit Loops."