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Jokes about Families - Mother Jokes
Prostitutes
A woman and her twelve year old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit. It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings. "Mom," said the boy, "What are all those women doing?" "They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied. The taxi driver turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don't you tell him the truth? They're hookers, boy! They have sex with men for money." The little boy's eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true Mom?" His mother, glaring hard at the driver, answers "Yes." After a few minutes the kid asks, "Mom, if those women have babies, what happens to them?" She replies, "Well, most of them become taxi drivers."
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Tooth Fairy
After losing another tooth, young Timmy became more curious about the mysterious tooth fairy. Finally putting two and two together, he came right out and asked, "Mom, are you the tooth fairy?" Deciding he was old enough to hear the truth, she replied, "Yes Timmy, I am." Timmy seemed to take this news quite well. As he headed for the door though, he slowly turned back toward his mother with a curious look on his face and said, "Wait a minute mom... how do you get into the other kids' houses?"
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Snakes And Bushes
Little Johnny walks in on his mother in the bathtub. He asks his mother what is the big fuzzy patch below her bellybutton. She replies, "A bush." The next day Little Johnny walks in on his father while he's in the shower. He asks, "What is that big long thing hanging between your legs?" His father replies, "It is a snake." A few days later, Little Johnny walks in on his mother, once again in the bathtub. He asks, "What are those two baggy things hanging above your bellybutton?" She replies, "Headlights." A couple weeks go by and the little boy walks in on his parents having sex. He yells, "Mom, turn on your headlights! The snake is crawling into your bush!"
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