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Ethnic / Country Jokes
Live Bait Fishing
There were these three blokes sitting on the high cliffs of a lonely beach, with a rope going down into the surf and a Chinaman frantically trying to climb up. While they were sitting there a Priest walks along, looks over and says, "God bless you children, that's Christianity at work. May the lord bless you both," and then kept on walking. One bloke looks at the other, "Who the fuck was that?" "Oh," said the other bloke, "that's Father Johnston. He knows all there is about the bible." The other bloke looked around and quickly says, "Well he knows fuck about shark fishing."
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Leprechaun Jokes
Three guys, one Irish, one English, and one Scottish, are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes in total," says the Genie. The Scottish guy says, "I am a fisherman, my Dad's a fisherman, his Dad was a fisherman and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish for all eternity." So, with a blink of the Genie's eye FOOM! the oceans were teaming with fish. The Englishman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around England, protecting her, so that no one will get in for all eternity." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye POOF! there was a huge wall around England. The Irishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall." The Genie explains, "well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick, protecting England so that nothing can get in or out." The Irishman says, "Fill it up with water."
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Language Trends of the Future
Language Trends of the Future
There are consistent trends in the past evolution of languages, and in all likelihood they will continue to change in the same fashion in the future. In 200 years, spoken French will have only one sound, a vowel. All consonants and gaps between words and sentences will disappear, leaving only an extended "Eauuuuuuuuuuuu..." Meaning will be inferred from facial expression. Written French will stay exactly the same.These consonants will not be entirely forgotten; they will migrate to Czechoslovakia, which will by that time have no use for vowels. In 200 years, the English vocabulary will be the union of all other vocabularies, but the spelling will be original. Similarly, the Japanese alphabet will be the union of all other alphabets in the world. The Cyrillic alphabet will eventually be the same as the Latin alphabet, only backwards. A mirror will suffice for translating Russian into Polish. Finally, in 200 years, entire books in Germany will be one word. Plus a verb at the end, of course.
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