Shanghai Escort

I met a local girl when I was in Shanghai. I asked her if she could escort me for a city tour and requested her mobile number so I could call her. She got excited and said: "sex sex sex, wan free sex for tonight" Wow, I'm guessing this is how Chinese women express their hospitality! But then, my other friend interpreted for me & told me what she really said : 666136429.

Cold Condom

Q: Why did the Polack put ice in his condom?
A: To keep the swelling down.

A Drink In A Chinese Restaurant

A man walks into a Chinese restaurant but is told by the    maître d  that there will be at least a twenty minute wait. "Would you like to wait in the bar, Sir?", he says. The man goes into the bar and the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The man replies, "Give me a Stoli with a twist." The bartender pauses for a few seconds, then smiles and says, "Once upon time, there were FOUR little peegs . . . "