Scott in Canada

This Scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to Canada. After a hard day on the slopes, he retires to a bar at the bottom of the mountain. After about five or six whiskeys, he looks up and notices a stuffed animal with antlers on the wall...
He asks the bartender, "What the fuck is that?"
The bartender replies, "It's a moose."
The Scottish chap shouts back, "Fuck me! How big are the cats?"

French Snails

Q: Why do french people eat snails ?
A: They don't like fast food.

Strong Britain

Q: What makes Britain so strong?
A: It´s the two-party system. One big party on every Friday and another big party on every Saturday