An Hour Fast

A man walks into a bar and sits down next to a beautiful blonde. "I just got this amazing watch," he tells her, "it can read alpha waves, and can tell me what a person is thinking." "What does it say about me?" asked the blonde. "It says you want to sleep with me," said the man. "Sorry," said the blonde, "I think your watch is broken." "Hmmm," said the man slowly examining the watch, "It seems to be running an hour fast."

Redhead and Blonde Parrot

One day a blonde and a redhead were playing together over the redhead's house while the redhead's father was out. The father had a pet parrot, which he did not let anyone else touch. But, when he left, the girls took him out. The girls were playing with it, when the blonde grabbed the parrot and accidentally ripped out one of its wings. "Now you've done it!" the red head yelled at the blonde. "Go buy him another one just like that, here's some money." The redhead went into her piggy bank and gave the blonde $50. "Okay," said the blonde, "but it's going to hard to find a parrot with only one wing."

The Porsche

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
A: You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.