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Bar Jokes - Drunk Jokes
Two Olives
Two olives were sitting at a bar having a couple martinis, when all of a sudden, one olive falls off his chair and hits the ground. The other olive looks down at him and says, "Oh man, are you okay?" The olive looks up at him and says, " Yes, Ol-live."
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Anhueser Busch
A drunk blonde walks into a bar, the bartender asks her what she would like, and she replies, "Gimme a beer." The bartender then asks, "Anheuser-Busch?" To which she replies, "Fine thanks, and how's your cock?"
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Ladies Night Out
Three women went out drinking and decided to have a contest to see who could get the drunkest. The next day the women all got together.
The first woman said, "I drove my car into a ditch."
The second woman said, "I blew chunks."
The third woman said, "I burned down my house."
After they all had told their stories, the third woman said, "I guess I won!" The second woman said, "Wait a minute, you don't understand, Chunks is my dog."
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