Lawnmower Vs. Soprano Sax

Q: What is the difference between a lawnmower and a soprano sax?
A: You can tune the lawnmower and the owner's neighbors don't mind if you don't return the sax when you borrow it.

Blonde at a Music Store

A blonde goes into a music store and asks the guy who works there where the country music CD's are. The salesman replies, "Try the other side." So the blonde moves to his other ear and says, "Where are the country music CD's?"

Tie Saplings To A Piano

Q: What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?
A: Root position cords.