Pig Misunderstanding

Howard County Police officers still write their reports by hand, and the data is entered later by a computer tech into their database. One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be an error, the tech called the farmer directly. "Is it true Mr. (Smith) that you lost 2,025 pigs?" she asked. "Yeth." lisped the farmer. Being a Howard County girl herself, the tech entered: "Subject lost 2 sows and 25 pigs."

Four Legs And Flies

Q: What has four legs and flies?
A: A pig!

Nearest Hotel Stop

A giant storm forces a man to pull over at the nearest hotel. The keeper says, "Alright, but there are 18 pigs in the room." The man says, "OK, I'll take it." The storm persists and another man asks for a room. The keeper says, "Alright, but there are 18 cows in the room." The man says, "OK, I'll take it." Finally, a third man asks for a room. The keeper says, "Alright, I have one room left, and it's filled with my 18 beautiful daughters." The man says, "OK, I'll take it." The next morning the three men talk in the lobby. The first man says that he feels like a pig. The second man says that he feels like a cow. The third man says, "Wow, I feel like a golfer!"