Training a Human

Q: Why are dolphins cleverer than humans?
A: Within 3 hours they can train a man to stand at the side of a pool and feed them fish!

The Three Moles

There was a mamma mole, a papa mole, and a baby mole. They lived in a hole outside of a farm house out in the country.  The papa mole reached his head out of the hole and said, "Mmmmm, I smell sausage.  The mama mole reached her head outside of the hole and said "Mmmmmm, I smell pancakes."  The baby mole tried to reach his head outside the hole but couldn't because of the two bigger moles. The baby mole said, "The only thing I can smell is molasses!"

Talking Monkey

A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car. The officer looked down at the monkey and said, "I wish you could talk." The monkey looked up at the officer and shook his head up and down. "You can understand what I'm saying?" asked the officer. Again, the monkey shook his head up and down. "Well, did you see this?" "Yes," motioned the monkey. "What happened?" The monkey pretended to have a can in his hand and turned it up by his mouth. "They were drinking?" asked the officer. The monkey shakes his head "Yes." "What else?" The monkey pinched his fingers together and held them to his mouth."They were smoking marijuana?" The monkey shakes his head "Yes." "What else?" The monkey motioned "kissing." "They were kissing, too?" asked the astounded officer. The monkey shakes his head "Yes." "Now wait, you're saying your owners were drinking, smoking and kissing before they wrecked. "The monkey shakes his head "Yes." "What were you doing during all this?" "Driving" motioned the monkey.