Nearest Hotel Stop

A giant storm forces a man to pull over at the nearest hotel. The keeper says, "Alright, but there are 18 pigs in the room." The man says, "OK, I'll take it." The storm persists and another man asks for a room. The keeper says, "Alright, but there are 18 cows in the room." The man says, "OK, I'll take it." Finally, a third man asks for a room. The keeper says, "Alright, I have one room left, and it's filled with my 18 beautiful daughters." The man says, "OK, I'll take it." The next morning the three men talk in the lobby. The first man says that he feels like a pig. The second man says that he feels like a cow. The third man says, "Wow, I feel like a golfer!"

Tilting Cow

Q: What do you call a cow with two legs?
A: Lean beef.

Worries about Mad Cow Disease

There were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."  The other cow replies, "I ain't worried, it don't affect us ducks."