Without a Horn

Judi went to a "Dude Ranch" on vacation. The cowboy preparing the horses asked if she wanted a Western or English saddle. Judi asked what the difference was. "Well, one has a horn and the other doesn't." "Just get the one without the horn. I don't think we'll run into too much traffic out here."

Pig Breakup

Q: Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
A: He was a boar !

The New Car

There once was a snail that wanted to buy a Nissan Z car. So, he went to a dealership and bought a car. "But," he said to the salesperson, "I would like my car personalized. Would it be possible to have the 'Z' replaced with an 'S?'" The dealer said yes, and it was done. And, as the snail raced around the city in his brand new car, everyone would see, "Wow, look at that S-car-go."