Partnership

Best friends graduating from medical school at the same time decided that, in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel. Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist.

They put up a sign reading: Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors.

The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

The docs changed it to read: Schizoids and Hemorrhoids.

This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign to read: Catatonics and High Colonics.

This was also a no-go.

Next they tried Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives.

Thumbs down again. Then came Minds and Behinds - still no good.

Another attempt resulted in Lost Souls and Butt Holes - unacceptable again!

So they tried Nuts and Butts - no way.

Freaks and Cheeks - still no good.

Loons and Moons - forget it.

Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with: Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends.

 
Everybody loved it...

Who's the Boss?

The external organs of a body were fighting over who should be boss.
The brain said, "I should be boss, since I control what the person thinks."
The hands said, "I should be boss because I do almost everything for the person."
The legs declared, "I should be boss since I carry the body and all the weight is on me."
So they went on, each stating their qualities and uses.Then the Asshole spoke up, "I think I should be boss, because.."
He had not finished when everyone else started laughing at him.
"You, an asshole, be the boss? You gotta be kidding!"
The asshole was very unhappy, and he closed himself up.The body soon suffered a terrible constipation, and the organs could not take it anymore.
"Ok, ok, you're the boss!" They gave in. So the asshole became the boss of the body.
The moral of the story: You don't need brains to be a boss, you just need to be an asshole.

The Gay Guys and the Proctologist

Two gay guys are sitting at a little pub looking out the window in a small town. This guy walks by, and the one guy says to the other, "Who is that?" The other man says, "That's the new proctologist." He replies, "Well, I've got to meet him." The next day, he makes an appointment and goes in to see him. The doctor asks him, "What's the problem?" and he replies, "I have a terrible pain in my butt." The doctor says, "Well, let's take a look at it." So he bends over, and the doctor gets down to look in his ass, and he says, "Oh My God! There's a stick up your ass." The gay man then says, "Well, pull it out, pull it out! So he start to pull it out, and notices that it has thorns on it. "Oh my God! There are thorns on it? Well, pull it out, pull it out!" As he pulls it out, he see it's a rose. "Oh my God! It's a rose!" As the gay man exclaims, "Well, read the card, read the card!"