Not A Pharmacist

Q: Why won't they hire a blonde pharmacist?
A: They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.

What Can I Get?

A man walks into a pharmacy and goes to the counter. Standing behind the counter is a young woman. "May I speak to the pharmacist?" he asks. "Well," she replies, "I am the pharmacist." He looks very uncomfortable, and asks for a *male* pharmacist, as he has a "male problem." She informs him that only she and her sister work at this particular establishment. He blushes and says, "Well, I really do need help, so I guess I'll ask you... I have a problem. I have a constant erection, and nothing I do seems to get rid of it. It's been like this for three months now. Can you give me anything for it?" The woman looks thoughtful, and says, "Hold on, I'll go in back and ask my sister." After a couple of minutes she returns and says, "We'll give you half of the business and it's profits, but that's all we can give you for it..."

The Poetic Pharmacy

A pharmacist tells his new young clerk, "When a customer comes into the shop, be very polite to them and try to put a little poetry into it when you're talking to them."  The youth says that he does not see what the pharmacist means by this, so the pharmacist says that he should observe when the next customer comes in and watch how he or she is dealt with.  Presently a middle aged woman comes in to the shop and asks for something for a tummy bug. The pharmacist says, "There's a lot of that virus going about, but this pink mixture should sort you out!"  "Oh thank you very much!" says the middle aged woman and she leaves the shop.  So the pharmacist says the youth can serve the next customer while he goes to tea break. "And remember to put some poetry into it," he says. The youth waits around and nobody comes in, so he decides to go to the restroom.  Just as he's about to head off, a young teenage girl comes in. "Can I help you?" he asks. She replies very embarrassedly that she would like to buy some sanitary napkins, to which the youth replies, "Hang on there Miss, I'm dying for a piss, but I'll be back in a flash, with a sash for your gash!"