Profession Jokes - Judge Jokes

Alimony

Staring down from the bench to announce the terms of the divorce decree, the judge turned to the husband and said: "I'm going to award her alimony in the amount of $250 a month." To which the woman's about-to-be ex replied: "That's mighty kind of you, judge. I'll try to help her all I can, too."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Crook Case

The judge called the case of People vs. Steven Lewon Crook. The bailiff opened the door to the holding cell and called, "Crook, come forward." Five of the prisoners entered the courtroom.

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Small Mistake

The divorce court was attentive as the wealthy Yuppette complained to the Judge that her husband had left her bed and board. When she had finished, the husband's lawyer rose to his feet and coolly replied, "Your Honor, I have a slight correction in the typing of the charging documents. My client claims that he left her bed 'bored'."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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