You Be the Judge!

A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem.  The mother leaped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them.  The man also wanted custody of his children, so the judge asked for his justification.  After a long silence, the man slowly rose from his chair and replied, "Your Honor, when I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Coke comes out, does the Coke belong to me or the machine?"

Good Business

Dr. Cutter is the local Veterinarian, known for his wry humor. He surpassed himself one summer day when a dog was brought to him after an encounter with a porcupine. After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and stitching, he returned the dog to its owner, who asked what she owed. "Two hundred and fifty dollars, Ma'am," he answered. "Why that's simply outrageous!" she stormed. "That's what's wrong with you Maine people, you're always trying to over charge summer visitors. Whatever do you do in the winter, when we're not being gypped here?" "Raise porcupines, Ma'am."

MCAT Question

When I was young, I wanted to be a doctor so I took the MCAT exam for Medical School. One of the questions asked us to rearrange the letters PNEIS into the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect. Those who answered 'spine' are doctors today.  The rest of us are sending jokes via email.