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Profession Jokes
Professions
Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says " I'm a Y.U.P.P.I.E, you know... Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist." The second guy says "I'm a D.I.N.K, you know... Double Income, No Kids." The third guy says, " I'm a R.U.B, you know... Rich, Urban, Biker." They turn to the woman and ask her, " What are you? " She replies: " I'm a WIFE, you know... Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc."
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Where to store a Rolls Royce
A man walks into a bank and says he wants to borrow $200 for six months. The loan officer asks him what kind of collateral he has. The man says 'I've got a Rolls Royce -- keep it until the loan is paid off-- here are the keys.' Six months later the man comes into the bank, pays back the $200 loan, plus $10 interest, and regains possession of the Rolls Royce. The loan officer asks him, 'Sir, if I may ask, why would a man who drives a Rolls Royce need to borrow two hundred dollars?' The man answers, 'I had to go to Europe for six months, and where else could I store a Rolls Royce for that long for ten dollars?'
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Clinton Gets Pissed
Bill Clinton walks out on to his front porch, and written in urine was ''The president must go.'' Bill Clinton storms into his office and demanded to know who did it. So his two body guards run out to find out who it was. Five hours later the two guards come back in, they told Bill, ''We have some bad news, and we have worse news.'' ''What is the bad news?'' asked Bill.
''Well, the bad news is, we took a urine test, and it was his vice president, Al Gore." "Whats the worst news?" asked Bill. The worst news is that it is Hillary's hand writing!"
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