Angry Drivers Meet

In a very small alley two trucks driving in opposite directions meet. As the drivers are equally stubborn, neither of them wants to reverse. They angrily look one at the other. Finally, one of them picks up a newspaper and starts reading. The other one politely asks, "When you've finished the paper, will you please bring it over, and let me read it?" 

The Vet Delivers

There was a country doctor who was the only doctor for miles around. He wanted to go on a fishing trip, so he called the vet and asked him to look after things while he was gone. The vet asked, "Is anything happening?"
The doctor replied, "Mrs. Jones is about due, but I don't think the baby will come before I get back. Anyway, if it does, just deliver it. This is her third, and the first two went really easily."
The vet agreed, and the doctor went on the fishing trip. When he returned, he called the vet. "How did things go while I was gone?"
"Pretty good. Mrs. Jones had her baby. It was an 8 pound boy. Everyone's doing fine."
"Did you have any trouble?"
"Well, there was just one little problem. I had a terrible time getting her to eat the afterbirth!"

The Doctor Said to the Housewife

The doctor said to the housewife, "I've got good news and I've got bad news.The good news is you don't have PMS. The bad news is...you're a bitch!"