Profession Jokes

Marriage Counseling

After 20 years of marriage a husband and wife go to counseling. When asked what the problem is, the wife breaks into a passionate tirade of every problem they've ever had. Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist gets up, walks over to the wife, makes her stand up and kisses her very hard. The woman shuts up and quietly sits down. The therapist says to the husband, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?" After a moment the husband replies, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays I fish."

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Marriage Jokes) , Profession Jokes
Anonymous

The Second Coming

A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says, "OK, Mrs. Jones, what's the problem?" The mother says, "It's my daughter, Darla. She keeps getting these cravings, she's putting on weight, and she's sick most mornings." The doctor gives Darla a thorough examination, then turns to the mother and says, "Well, I don't know how to tell you this, but your Darla is pregnant -- about four months would be my guess." The mother says, "Pregnant?!? She can't be. She has never even been left alone with a man! Have you Darla?" Darla says, "No mother! I've never even kissed a man!" The doctor walks over to the window and just stares out of it. About five minutes pass and finally the mother says, "Is there something wrong out there, doctor?" The doctor replies, "No, not really. It's just that the last time anything like this happened, a star appeared in the East and three wise men came over the hill. I'll be darned if I'm going to miss it this time!"

Categories: Profession Jokes (OBGYN Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Daughter Jokes)
Anonymous

A Perfect Circle

Q: What did the farmer use to make crop circles?
A: A Protractor

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Profession Jokes (Farmer Jokes) , Riddles (Riddles for Kids) , Math & Science Jokes , Math & Science Jokes (Space Jokes) , Word Play Jokes
Anonymous
Trackuser=No (Robot detected) |IsRobot=Yes |

Page rendered in 0.2358 seconds