400 Legs And No Pubic Hair

Q: What's got 400 legs and no pubic hair?
A: The front row of a Hanson concert

Men & Public Toilets

Ok guys, own up...which one are you?

• Excitable Type - Pants are twisted, cannot find hole, rips pants in anger.
• Sociable Type - Joins pals for a pee whether he wants one or not.
• Timid Type - Cannot pee if anyone is watching, pretends he has been and sneaks back later.
• Nosy Type - Peeps over partition to have a look at the other fellow's thingy.
• Indifferent Type - All urinals being occupied, uses sink.
• Clever Type - Pees without holding tool, shows off by adjusting tie at the same time, pees on foot.
• Vain Type - Undoes 5 buttons when 2 will do.
• Absent-Minded Type - Opens jacket, takes out tie, pees in pants.
• Worried Type - Is not quite sure what he has been up to lately, makes a furtive but close inspection of tool while peeing.
• Disgruntled Type - Stands for a while, grunts, farts, tries to pee, fails, farts again and walks out muttering.
• Conceited Type - Holds 2-inch tool like a baseball bat while peeing.
• Sneaky Type - Drops silent farts while peeing and looks at the guy next to him.
• Sloppy Type - Pees on shoe, walks out with flies undone, adjusts himself ten minutes later.
• Learned Type - Reads a book or newspaper while peeing.
• Childish Type - Watches bubbles at bottom of the urinal while peeing.
• Efficient Type - Waits until has to poop and does both at the same time.
• Strong Type - Bangs tool on side of urinal to remove drops.
• Drunken Type - Pulls out tool, sees two, puts one away, and pees in trousers.
• Embarrassed Type - Covers tool with both hands and pees through fingers.
• Cock-Eyed Type - Stands in one cubical and pees in next one.

Holiday Tattoo

A girl gets a tattoo of Santa Claus on one thigh and a turkey on the other. She wants to show that there is something good to eat in between Thanksgiving and Christmas.