Only Time

I think the only reason my husband likes to go fishing so much is that it's the only time he hears someone tell him, "Wow, that's a big one!"

The Cruise

An elderly couple was on a cruise, and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find her. So the captain sent the old man home with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the ship.
It read: "Sir, sorry to inform you, but we found your wife had died in the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and found an oyster attached to her butt. Inside was a pearl worth $50,000. Please advise?"
The old man faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap!"

Neighborhood Watch

My neighbor fills his boat with nets and rods every morning, then goes out to sea.
Something fishy going on there I think