Kidnappers Caught Him

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.
January 12, 1993 - San Francisco  police arrested Russell C. Sultan in July and charged him with attempting to extort $23,000 from his mother and girlfriend by claiming to have been kidnapped for ransom. After tracing telephone calls, police, guns drawn, burst into a motel room to find Sultan casually eating fried chicken and watching a 49ers football game. Sultan said the kidnappers had merely left him alone for a while, and exclaimed to the officers, "What took you so long?"

Dallas Cowboys Playing Surface

Q: Why do the Dallas Cowboys now play on dirt?
A: Because Leon Lett smoked all the grass and sniffed all the lines.

NFL Record

Q: What NFL record did Aaron Hernandez just set?
A: Longest hang time by a player who doesn't punt.