Superbowl

Q: What did the 49ers fan say after his team won the Super Bowl?
A: "Dammit mom, why'd you wake me up? I was having an amazing dream!"
 

Pack The Defense

Q: Why do managers bring suitcases along to away games?
A: So that they can pack the defense!

Wedding Day Baseball

There was a man named Joe playing baseball on his wedding day. The guy at the plate hits the ball, and it nails Joe right in the genitals. His teammates rush him to the hospital and take him into the emergency room. As he's lying on the table the doctor looks at him and says, ''That's pretty bad. I don't think there's anything I can do for that.'' Joe says, ''Oh please doc it's my wedding night. You've gotta do something!'' The doctor then says, ''Well, I can put two tongue depressors around it and wrap it with gauze tape to immobilize it.'' Joe says, ''Oh thank you, doc. Just don't tell my fiancé.'' They get married and later that night Joe's lying on the bed and his wife comes out in a sexy outfit. She unbuttons it, grabs her breasts and says, ''Do you see these beautiful breasts? No one else has ever seen these. I've been saving them just for you.'' ''Thats nothing,'' Joe replies. He pulls down his pants and says, ''Look at this. It's not even out of the box yet!''