Why Ask Why - 3

• When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
• If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?
• Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?
• Why do 'tug'boats push their barges?
• Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?
• Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
• Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?
• Why does one get in trouble for wreckLESS driving?
• Does a fish get cramps after eating?
• Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

Bear Logic

Two campers were hiking in the forest when all of a sudden a bear jumps out of a bush and starts chasing them. Both campers start running for their lives, when one of them stops and starts to put on his running shoes. His partner says, "What are you doing? You can't outrun a bear!" His friend replies, "I don't have to outrun the bear, I only have to outrun you!"

Beethoven's Ninth Game

The St. Louis Symphony was playing Beethoven's Ninth one night. One bass player said to the other: ''We don't have much to do. Let's go next door for a few drinks.'' They stayed for a while and got a little tipsy. One said to the other: ''To give us more time, I tied the pages of the music together so the conductor will have to untie it when he gets near the end.''
They staggered back into the auditorium just in time for the finish. The next day when someone asked their friend how the concert was they replied: ''The most exciting part was at the end of the Ninth when the score was tied and the bassists were loaded.''