Seminars for a woman

SEMINARS FOR WOMEN In response to the seminar offerings by the female staff, the male staff has created a set of courses for females of all marital status. The following courses will be offered: 

• General Education: GE101: Why the Toilet Seat Has Hinges
• GE102: Checkbook Balancing (formerly "Remedial Third Grade Arithmetic")
• GE103: How to Drive a Nail Without Breaking One
• GE104: How to Parallel Park
• GE105: Why Going to the Bathroom is Not a Group Activity
• GE106: Road Maps and Other Crutches for Spineless Wimps
• GE107: Why a Bad Sports Telecast is Better Than a Good Soap Opera
• Home Economics: HE101a: Over-Laundering - Why Clothing Wears Out Premature
• HE101b: Over-Vacuuming - Why Carpets Wear Out Prematurely
• HE101c: Over-Dusting - Why Furniture Wears Out Prematurely
• HE101d: Over-Washing - Why Dishes Wear Out Prematurely
• HE102: How to Avoid Spending Money You Don't Have (formerly "How to Cut Credit Cards in Half")
• HE103: Overcoming "The Imelda Syndrome" (formerly called "How Many Feet Do You Have, Anyway?")
• Interpersonal Relationships: IR101: How to Say "No" With Kindness and Appreciation
• IR102: Why Men Enjoy Grocery Shopping About As Much As Women Enjoy Watching Roller Derby
• IR103: Submission - a Biblical Perspective (prereq: SE101a or b)
• IR104: Marriage - The Number One Cause of Divorce
• IR105: Preposterous Mood Swings (PMS) (formerly "Keeping Your Personal Problems from Ruining Everyone Else's Life Too")
• IR106: Understanding Men's Revulsion to Tampon Commercials (formerly called "We Know What That Little 'Plastic Applicator' is REALLY For!")

Three Wise Women...

Do you know what would have happened if it had been Three Wise Women instead of Three Wise Men? They would have asked directions, arrived on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, made a casserole, and, brought practical gifts!

Smart to Cross the River

Three Blonde men escaped from a jail. As they were running from the police, they ran into a river. The first man dropped to his knees and prayed that God would make him smart so that he could get across the river. He was immediately turned into a redhead and made a raft to get across the river. Soon, he escaped. The second man began to pray that God would make him smarter than the man before him, and was turned in to a brunette. He made a boat and rode across the river to safety. The third man asked God to make him smarter than the first two men and was turned into a woman. Smiling, she (he) got up and walked across the bridge!!