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Sex Jokes - Transvestite Jokes
Quick Wit
An older guy goes to the doctor’s office to ask about getting a prescription for Viagra. He’s in the waiting room when the woman at the reception desk calls his name and says, for everyone to hear, “Mr. Herder, You’re here to see the doctor about your impotence, right?” The guy is mortified. “No,” he says, just as loudly. “I’m looking into getting a sex change operation, and I was hoping to get the same doctor who did yours.”
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Bad Jeeves
A wealthy couple had planned to go out for the evening. The woman of the house decided to give their butler, Jeeves, the rest of the night off. She said they would be home very late, and that he should just enjoy his evening.
As it turned out, however, the wife wasn't having a good time at the party, so she came home early, alone. Her husband had to stay there, as several of his important clients were there.
As the woman walked into her house, she saw Jeeves sitting by himself in the dining room. She called for him to follow her, and led him into the master bedroom. She looked at him and smiled. "Jeeves," she said. "Take off my dress."
He did this carefully. "Jeeves," she continued. "Take off my stockings and garter."
He silently obeyed her. "Jeeves," she then said. "Remove my bra and panties. "
As he did this, the tension continued to mount. She then said, "Jeeves, if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!"
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Fair Price
A man finds himself staying in a Vegas hotel room while on a business trip. Not wishing to be alone, he calls an "escort" service for some company. Soon, a strikingly beautiful hooker arrives. Without preamble the hooker says, "I want to tell you right up front, my minimum fee is $500, and that's for a hand job."
"$500 for a hand job? Why, that's outrageous!" the man exclaimed. "No hand job in the world could be worth $500!"
The hooker summons the man to the window and points down onto the parking lot below. "See that cherry red Maserati down there? I own that because of what I can do with my hands."
Against his better judgement, the man pays the $500 and sure enough the hooker sends him into utter bliss, by far the best sexual experience of his life. After he recuperates he says to the hooker, "God that was fantastic!! How much for a blowjob?"
"$2500," the hooker replied.
"$2500 for a blowjob?" Cried the astonished man. "That's way too much!"
Again the hooker summons the man to the window, this time pointing across the street. "Do you see that large medical building right off the strip there? I own that because of what I can do with my mouth."
"Oh no," moans the man, "this is gonna break me, but I just have to try it." Once again the hooker takes him to the edge of the universe and back, far surpassing the pleasure he received earlier, leaving him utterly drained and totally gratified. As soon as the man can speak again, he says, "I just have to know. How much do you get for pussy?"
The hooker drags the man to the window for a third time, points and proclaims, "Do you see the MGM Grand Hotel sitting there on the corner? I could own that if I had a pussy!"
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