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Sex Jokes
Have You Ever Seen a Ghost?
A visiting professor at the University of Alabama is giving a seminar on the supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asks: "How many people here believe in ghosts?". About 90 students raise their hands. "Well that's a good start. Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you've ever seen a ghost?". About 40 students raise their hands. "That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost?" 15 students raise their hands. "That's a great response. Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?" 3 students raise their hands. "That's fantastic. But let me ask you one question further. Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?" One student in the back raises his hand. The professor is astonished. He takes off glasses, takes a step back, and says, "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have slept with a ghost. You've got to come up here and tell us about your experience." The redneck student (remember, this is Alabama) replies with a nod and begins to make his way up to the podium. The professor says, "Well, tell us what it's like to have sex with a Ghost." The student replies, "Ghost?!? I thought you said 'goats!'"
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Making a Sandwich
One day Little Johnny asks his Mum, "How come when I come in to your room you and you're on top of Daddy, you say you're making a sandwich, but after a while I come in again, you're eating a sausage?!"
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No Rest on this Island
A group of people were in a shipwreck and were stranded on an island. The group consisted of 12 women and 1 man. After a few months, the women grew horny and it was decided that the man would take two women a day and they would allow him to have Sundays off.
One day on a day off, he was just relaxing when he noticed a boat nearing. He felt hopeful that maybe they would be rescued at last. The boat was almost to the island when the guy noticed it was a man in the boat. As he got out, the first guy said, "Oh my God buddy, am I ever glad to see YOU!" To which the second guy responded, "Well alright sweetie! It's been a long time for me too." first man exclaimed, "Oh hell, there go my Sundays!"
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