Sex Jokes - One Night Stand Jokes

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Witch to Believe

A guy embezzled money from his company and was about to jump off a bridge, when an old hag appeared and told him she was a witch, and would put the money back if he would sleep with her. He did, and was ready to go back to work, believing his problems were solved, when the old hag who was in bed smoking a cigarette asked him, “Sonny, aren’t you too old to believe in witches?”

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Submitted BY: jerryrosenberg

Wife at Home Depot

Brandon was installing a new door and realized one of the hinges was missing. He asked his wife Kate if she would go to Home Depot and pick up a hinge. Kate said sure and headed off to the store. While she was waiting for the orange vested employee to finish with another customer, she noticed a beautiful shower head.
When the employee turned to her, Kate asked him, "How much is that shower head?" The employee replied, "That's our best Grohe RainShower head and it's on sale for $545.00.
Kate exclaimed, "My goodness, that is a very expensive shower head.  It's certainly out of my price bracket."
She then proceeded to describe the hinge that Brandon had sent her to buy. The Home Depot employee said that he had them in top stock and brought a wheeled ladder to get one for her. From the top of the ladder the employee yelled, "Ma'am, do you wanna screw for the hinge?"
Kate paused for a moment and then shouted back, "No, but I will for the Grohe shower head.''
This is why you can't send a woman to Home Depot!

Anonymous

Looking For A Name

The new mother got out of bed for the first time since her childbirth dressed in her robe and walked down the hospital hallway to the nurses desk where she asked for a phone book. "What are you doing out here! You should be in your room resting," the nurse exclaimed. "I want to search through the phone book for a name for my baby," the new mother replied. "You don't have to do that here. The hospital furnished a booklet to all new mothers to assist them in picking a first name for their baby." "You don't understand," the woman said and frowned. "My baby already has a FIRST name!"

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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