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Sex Jokes - Denied Sex Jokes
Nothing Changed
On the eve of the couple's tenth wedding anniversary, the still slim wife was bragging about her figure. "You know honey," she said, "I can still get into the skirts I had before we were married." "Yeah?" the husband replied as he turned his attention back to the ball game on TV. "I wish to hell I could."
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Back Yard
A husband and wife were in their back yard when he was noticed her expanding backside. He commented, "Boy, your ass is getting big. Almost as big as the gas grill here."
She angrily stomped across the yard, and he followed saying, "Yep, that thing is getting huge." At this, the wife retreated to the far side of the yard. Soon he approached with a tapemeasure, acquired the width, and exclaimed, "It IS as big as the gas grill!"
Later that night when they were in bed, the husband started making moves on his wife. She just turned away. "C'mon, honey," he said, "what's wrong?"
Her cold reply was, "I'm not firing up this grill for just one little weiner!"
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How Do You Know?
Q: How do you know you're leading a sad life?
A: When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Let's just be friends."
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