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Sex Jokes
Potential and Realistic
A boy asks his dad, “What’s the difference between potential and realistic?” The dad tells him to go ask the rest of his family if they’d sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then he’d tell him the answer. The boy goes up to his mom and asks her. She responds, “A million dollars is a lot of money sweetheart. I could send you, your sister, and your brother to great colleges, so sure, I would!” He then goes and asks his sister to which she replies, “Brad Pitt? Hell ya, he’s the hottest guy ever!” Next, the boy asks his brother who replies, “A million dollars? Hell yes I would. I’d be rich!” When the boy excitedly returns to his dad with the family’s responses, the dad says, “Well son, potentially, we have three million dollars. Realistically, we have two sluts and a queer.”
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Saved Your Privates
A soldier goes into the hospital for surgery after being wounded in battle. Waking up from the anesthesia he sees his doctor standing at his bedside. "So tell me Doc, what did you do to me?" The doctor says, "Son, we have some good news and some bad news." "Yeah, what?" replies the patient. "Well the good news is that we were able to save your private parts." "Yes, that is good news Doc, but what about the bad news?" "We put them under your pillow!"
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Gynecologist Patient Comprehension Exam
This chick walks into a doctor's office. The nurse tells her to take off her clothes, and that the doctor will be with her in a minute. She obeys.
The doctor walks in and takes off his coat. He begins to feel between her thighs.
Doctor: "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
Woman: "You're checking for menopause."
Doctor: "Very good."
Then, he starts to feel her tits.
Doctor: "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
Woman: "Checking for breast cancer."
Doctor: "Very good."
Then, he jumps on her and penetrates her.
Doctor: "Do you know what I'm doing now?"
Woman: "Contracting genital herpes. That's why I came to see you!"
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