Language Makes Us Dominant

I had a linguistics professor who said that it's man's ability to use language that makes him the dominant species on the planet. That may be. Though, I think there's one other thing that separates us from animals; we aren't afraid of vacuum cleaners.

No Oranges

Father: If I had ten oranges and gave you two, how many would I have left?
Son: I don't know, because in school we learn on apples.

Writing Letters to Son

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.
One student fell into a cycle of classes, studying, working and sleeping. Didn't realize how long he had neglected writing home until he received the following note: "Dear Son, Your mother and I enjoyed your last letter. Of course, we were much younger then, and more impressionable. Love, Dad."