Two Elves

Two elves walk into Santa's office. Santa looks up and says, "Gary, Larry, how can I help you?" Gary and Larry look at each other, then turn to Santa.
"Santa", Gary says, "Are there any elf nuns in the workshop?" Santa checks a list and says, "No, I'm sorry but there are no elf nuns in the workshop."
Gary asks, "Well Santa, are there any elf nuns working any where in our factory?" Santa checks a list then says, "I'm sorry, but there are no elf nuns working in the factory."
Gary looks at Larry and asks, "Santa, are there any elf nuns in the North Pole at all?" Santa looks at his list for a few minutes and says, "I'm sorry Gary, but there aren't any elf nuns in the North Pole."
Larry finally busts out laughing and says, "Gary fucked a penguin, Gary fucked a penguin! 

Profiling

Two priests are out driving and they get pulled over by a cop. The cop approaches the priests vehicle and says to the driver "Sorry to pull you over father, but we’re looking for a couple of child molesters." The two priests look at each other for a few moments and then have a few quiet words to each other. The driver turns back to the cop and says, "Alright officer, we’ll do it"

Difference Between Priest and Homosexual

Q: What is the difference between a priest and a homosexual?
A: The way they say ahhhh-men.