Trouble Swallowing

Mother: What seems to be the problem with you? You have been married three years and still no children. I had hopes of being a grandmother by now.
Daughter: I just don't know, Mom! Billy tries all the time, it's just that I have a lot of trouble swallowing.

Wife Traveling

My wife's gone to the West Indies. J'ya make'er? No, Barbados.

Rough

Tell ya what though, I don't have it nearly as rough as one of my neighbors. When he attends a wife swapping party, he has to throw in the maid, and a mistress to be named later.