Same Response

My wife often complains to me when she's drunk. Last night she complained when she was sober.
Non alcoholic whine.

Still Hot for Each Other

An old man and an old woman were sitting at the breakfast table on the morning of their 50th wedding anniversary.
The old man said,"You know, 50 years ago, we were probably sitting here buck naked."
The woman said, "Why don't we try that again?"  
So they stripped and sat down at the table again.
Soon the old woman said, "Honey, my titties are as hot for you today as they were 50 years ago."
The man replied, "Of course they are dear, one's in your oatmeal and the others in your coffee!"

Man's Worst Nightmare

What's a man's worst nightmare?
1) The Super Bowl is preempted by a soap opera.
2) His wife has amnesia and forgets how to cook so he has to.
3) A female boss.
4) He has to ask his wife for money.