Cowboy in a Barber Shop

A cowboy walked into a barber shop, sat on the barber's chair and said, "I'll have a shave and a shoe shine." The barber began to lather his face while a woman with the biggest, firmest, most beautiful breasts that he had ever seen knelt down and began to shine his shoes.
The cowboy said, "Young lady, you and I should go and spend some time in a hotel room." She replied, "I'm married and my husband wouldn't like that. The cowboy said, "Tell him your working overtime and I'll pay you the difference." She said, "You tell him. He is the one shaving you."

Chit Chat

Two mates are having a chat over a beer. "Do you like sheilas with bad body odor and bad breath?" one bloke asks his friend. "No way!" his mate replies. "Well," says the first bloke," do you like pussies you could hide a watermelon in?" "Fuck no!" his mate replies. "Well," says the first bloke, "what the hell are you doing fuckin' around with my wife?"

Triplets

A doctor from Canada was having an affair with one of his female co-workers. One day she announced to him that she was pregnant with his child. The doctor gave her enough money to fly to California and live their until the child was born. He gave her instructions to send him a postcard with the word SAURKRAUT on it when she gave birth. About nine months later the doctor arrived home when his wife handed him a postcard. "Here", she said. "This came in the mail today". The doctor took the postcard and it read... SAURKRAUT SAURKRAUT SAURKRAUT;  TWO WITH WEINERS & ONE WITHOUT!