Man's Worst Nightmare

What's a man's worst nightmare?
1) The Super Bowl is preempted by a soap opera.
2) His wife has amnesia and forgets how to cook so he has to.
3) A female boss.
4) He has to ask his wife for money.

Three Tasks for the King's Daughter

Three men want to marry the king's most beautiful daughter. The king agrees to give them a chance, but they must perform three difficult tasks: defeat an ogre, turn lead to gold, and screw a cow. The first man dies fighting the ogre, the second fails at turning lead to gold, but the third man successfully completes all three tasks. "Congratulations!" says the king. "You may now have my daughter's hand in marriage." "Screw that," says the man. "I want the cow."

Exorcist Husband

"They call my husband 'The Exorcist." "Why?" "As soon as he gets to a party, he rids it of all the spirits."