By My Side

Harry is on his death bed, his wife Zelda is by his side: "Zelda, you've always been by my side" "When I broke my leg at 25; you were by my side. When I had my first heart attack at 45; you were by my side. When I had my second heart attack at 65; you were by my side. When I broke my hip at 75; you were by my side. Now, when I'm dying; you are at my side. Zelda, you're a fucking jinx!!"

A Promise to Keep

"But this isn't an engagement ring." the young lady protested. "Why it's just a tiny unset diamond."  "Yeah ! I know." said the fellow, "And, it'll be mounted in a cluster around a big one, the very day after you are."

Long Marriage

Some people ask the secret of Anthony's long marriage. They take time to go to a restaurant two times a week: a little candlelight dinner, soft music, and a slow walk home. The Mrs. goes Tuesdays; He goes Fridays.