Bill And Hillary Are At A Restaurant...

Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight's special is chicken almondine and fresh fish. The chicken sounds good, I'll have that," Hillary says. The waiter nods. And the vegetable?" he asks. Oh, He'll have the fish," Hillary replies.

Headache Cure

John went to Dr. Smith because of intense migraine headaches. The doctor tried many things, but no relief. Finally, after many visits, the doc sat down and said, "You know, John, why don't you try something unusual. Why don't you do something that I always do when I have a headache like that.  I phone my wife and tell her I'm coming home. She waits for me in the bedroom, with her blouse off, and I nestle my head between those two beautiful breasts and soon the headache disappears! You ought to try something like that-- I don't know what else to do for you. It wouldn't hurt." "Well I might try something like that," said John. A month later, John is back in the clinic, seeing another doctor on another unrelated matter, and he and Dr. Smith pass each other in the hallway. "John!" says the doc, "Haven't seen you in a while!  How are those headaches?" "Great! They're all gone! Thanks for your advice!" said John. "Hey, that's fantastic!" said Dr. Smith, walking on down the hallway. "Say, Doc!" yelled John, down the hall, "Nice place you got there!"

Pack Your Bag.

.A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, "Martha, pack up your things!  I just won the California lottery!"  Martha replies,  "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?" The man responds, "I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!"