Crossed to the Other Side

Just as the graveside service finished, there was a distant lightning bolt accompanied by a tremendous burst of rumbling thunder. The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, "Well, she's there and it's His problem now."

Mugged

I got mugged by a thief last night on my way home from work. He pointing a knife at me and said, "Your money or your life!" I told him I was married so I have no money and I have no life.
We hugged and cried together. It was a beautiful moment.

Who Was It?

The man came home to find evidence that his wife had been unfaithful.
"Was it my friend Steve?" he yelled.
"No," she said.
"Was it my friend James?" he then asked.
"What?" she shouted. "Don't you think I have any friends of my own?"