English vs Ebonics

English: This is your Captain speaking, we have leveled off and are cruising at flight level three five zero.   Feel free to move about the cabin.  Also the First Officer has turned off the no smoking sign, the flight attendants will be serving cocktails and refreshments momentarily, so just sit back and enjoy the rest of the flight.  We'll be arriving at our destination in 20 minutes and I expect no delays. Enjoy the rest of your flight.
Ebonics: Ebonia Airlines Dis be yo' main man, we be chillin at tray-five -o, if you be flexin, get up off yo ass and shake that thang, my homey be killin' the man's opression.  If you wanna smoke chronic, just hang loose blood, them bitches be cruizin' on up with some forty-ounce 8-ball, so stop trippin' and sit your ass back down.  We be in the hood in no time afterall, I be bumpin switches all da' way. Peace out!

Floating Television

Q: What do you say when you see your television floating at night?
A: "Drop it nigga."

Quick Lesson

A young black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is baking. He puts his hands in the flour and coats his face with it. He looks at his mother and says, "Look Momma, I'm a white boy." His mother slaps him hard on the face and says, "Boy, go show your Daddy." The boy goes into the living room and says "Look Daddy, I'm a white boy." His Daddy slaps him on the face too and says, "Boy, go show your grandmother." So the boy goes to see his grandma and says, "Look Granny, I'm a white boy." She slaps him on the face and sends him back to his mother. His mother says, "Well, did you learn something from all this?" The boy shakes his head and says, "I sure 'nuff did, I've only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people".