Stop Redundancy

The Committee for the Reduction of Redundancy and the Anti - proliferation of Repetition has decided not to meet until they have their first meeting and thus will not be meeting until the first time. Their Pre-meeting Statement wanted to make this clear before they had their first meeting, so that it would not be un or confusing. So their first meeting will actually be their first meeting and they will not have a meeting before the first meeting. This should avoid having people show up for their first meeting before it is held, since to do so would be confusing to those who did so and this is what they want to avoid by reducing the confusion and lessening the repetition.

Punctual

Being punctual in our Office was of no benefit what-so-ever.
There was never anybody around to appreciate it.

Short Term Job

I had a job once, it lasted a month. I finally called the boss and said, "I can't come in for a few days." He said, "What's the matter, you sick?" I said, " No, I just have to wait until this thought of wanting to kill you goes away."